The Collapsed Narcissist

Never contend with with a man who has nothing to lose, for thereby, you enter into an unequal conflict.  – Baltasar Gracian

(Read time 1-2 mins)

A collapsed narcissist is a narcissist who has experienced a severe enough narcissistic injury to have every piece of the scaffolding that holds up his false self, splinter and break, leaving him in a figurative heap on the floor. It may be so severe that he experiences disassociation temporarily. He has nothing to lose, no one to distract him, no one onto whom he project his inner hate, envy, rage and trash, no one to prop him up.

He is alone, and forced to deal with all of the darkness, turmoil and hate that he is typically able to avoid by inflicting it on his partner. He has to deal with himself, since he has no one to foist this onerous, toxic burden upon.

A collapsed narcissist can be dangerous. Being the target of a collapsed narcissist’s emotional frenzy, rage and wrath is very disturbing, distressing, and traumatic.

continue reading

Do Narcissists Feel Regret?

Do narcissists feel regret when they hurt their partners? Regret is a powerful, toxic and very dangerous weapon in the hands of a narcissist, that he/she draws out once the partner’s love and loyalty has been firmly secured. Regret, in the hands of a narcissist, is a sophisticated form of coercive control and total fakery used to manipulate the partner into compliance.

Read More...

The Turmoil Trap and The Path To Freedom

“The path to freedom requires but one thing: that you choose to take it.”

(Read time: 1-2 mins)

One of the most distressing elements in healing from narcissistic abuse is the intense emotional conflict between the relief at being free from the toxic dynamic and abuse, and the longing to have what you thought you had, with the person you fell in love with. There is a tidal quality to this emotional and mental struggle. The conflicting feelings ebb and flow, and sometimes pound the shore of your soul. It’s a turmoil trap of pain, confusion, and emotional exhaustion. continue reading